This has Nothing to do with Valentine's Day or Sexism
I came up with a scientific hypothesis today. It is about the fundamental difference between men and women. And it is bigger than just length of hair or level of aversion to the color pink. This is a serious breakthrough, so hold on to your seat. The world of of behavioral science is about to take a kidney-punch to the kidneys.
"What else," you may wonder (and reasonably so), "is there to learn about the difference between men and women? It's all been said."
We will see. Tonight, I plan to scientifically gather data which will point to the fundamental difference between men and women. Under conditions well suited to the experiment (a predicted low outside temperature of 260 Kelvin), my associates and I will sit in the lobby of a residence hall which is inhabited by both young men and women. For an extended period of time, we will discretely observe and record the behavior of every person who leaves or enters through the main door. And by midnight tonight, it will surely be proven:
Women, when entering through a door, tend to open the door much wider than necessary, while men tend to open the door only slightly wider than is necessary to fit through, assuming it is cold outside.